By Dovid Shlomo Soibil
I was raised in a secular environment, so it should not be surprising that I really did not know much about the Rebbe until after October 7 of last year. I have a vague recollection of buzz among Jews in NYC when he died but did not understand it. My experience with Chabad was also limited. I recall years ago declining an offer to put on tefillin since I had no idea what it was, but I did take up an offer while walking around in Manhattan on a cold December night to have some hot chocolate in a Chabad van mainly because I was freezing. I was given a Chanukiah and candles when I left which I still have unused in a drawer at home. In both cases, the Yeshiva boys asked me if I were Jewish and I had no hesitation saying yes but my secular mentality at that time, unfortunately, did not lead to more engagement and curiosity about Judaism.
I recalled that my great grandparents were observant Jews, my grandparents rebelled against what they saw as Orthodox restrictions preventing them from assimilating and being considered fully American, and my parents emphasized the importance of fitting in and not sticking out where religion was not considered a polite conversation topic but rather something private.
This is extremely embarrassing for me to say, and I feel ashamed about it, but I now feel comfortable enough to tell you: Prior to October 7, I had not been inside of a synagogue for 10 years. I saw Orthodox Jews as serious, austere, and intimidating (almost scary) and generally avoided such interactions. I had no inclination to explore Judaism while I was instead exploring many countries and cultures throughout the world and can offer no explanation as to why. But when the words of the Rebbe finally hit my ears, things would be different as I will explain. And I would begin to understand that the Rebbe would say to focus on doing the right thing and making corrections rather than festering in embarrassment and shame.
After October 7, everything changed. At the time, I did not understand why, but something was sparked inside of me yearning for and demanding change that led to such intense emotions and confusion that I felt compelled to seek out a discussion with a rabbi. My secular education and research habits led me to carefully comparing and contrasting different forms of Judaism from reform to conservative to orthodox.
Then some things happened. As I passed by Kosher Kingdom last December, some Chabad boys asked me to put on tefillin and for some reason I agreed and was moved by the experience. Then I recalled having met a rabbi from Lubavitch Aventura South in Florida in 2019 when he helped me translate some Yiddish on a photo I had of my great grandmother. At the time, I did not realize he was associated with Chabad. As my research continued, I found myself becoming more and more drawn to Chabad given its stated mission and quotes of and about the Rebbe.
I would like to share some of the quotes of the Rebbe and about the Rebbe that were instrumental in my approaching Lubavitch Aventura South in Aventura and Chabad Chayil in Highland Lakes in Tevet (January) of this year and becoming a member of these communities the last 6 months.[1] The words resonated with me and the more I read, the more I thought the Rebbe understood my situation, confusion, and yearning for a significant change to my life.
In my initial communication to the rabbi, I explained I was approaching Chabad because “The Lubavitcher Rebbe stressed the importance of reaching out to every single Jew, regardless of their background, status or affiliation.”
I could relate easily to the Rebbe’s statements:
“Inside each Jew there is a pintele Yid, a strong spark of his Neshama, waiting to be ignited.”
“When the soul is starved for nourishment, it lets us know with feelings of emptiness, anxiety, or yearning.”
“Our mission on earth is to recognize the void – inside and outside of us – and fill it.”
I was inspired by his philosophy as he expressed:
“The way to build Klal Yisroel is to do it one Jew at a time.”
“No Jew will be left behind.”
“One must go to a place where nothing is known of Godliness, nothing is known of Judaism, nothing is even known of the Hebrew alphabet, and while there, put one’s own self aside and ensure that the other calls out to God! . . . Indeed, if one wants to ensure his own connection to God, he must make sure that the other person not only becomes familiar with but actually calls out to God!”
And I knew Chabad may be right for me when I read his insight:
“Wisdom is not found solely in knowledge, but in the humility to learn from others.”
and the “insight of one of the Rebbe’s most vocal ideological opponents, Rabbi Yoel Teitelbaum, the Satmar Rebbe, who is reported to have complimented the Rebbe’s Mitzvah Campaign initiative:
“When a shaliach asks a passer-by if he or she is Jewish, this compels the Yid to affirm his Jewish identity, awakening connection and touching the spark within.”
“The mere recognition that one is Jewish can reignite the candle flame of one’s soul, spreading light throughout the universe. The Rebbe referred to this mission as “Gaon Yaakov”—the restoration of authentic Jewish pride based on a return to Jewish identity, practice, values, ritual and tradition.”[2]
Because of the Rebbe’s words, I was comfortable approaching Chabad. There was no reason to continue to be intimidated by Orthodox and Chassidic Jews. I was ready to put aside my feelings of embarrassment and shame for having been disconnected from Judaism for so long, ask questions, learn from and be inspired by all of you, and make the necessary changes and corrections to be a better Jew. And I would learn from you all, my awe-inspiring Chabad teachers, that in the end it was not October 7 that brought me back to Judaism. I will not allow antisemites and Jew haters to take credit for the most important journey of my life. But rather it has been the constant nourishment of my neshama from learning from all of you at Chabad that defines my return. This was the impact of the Rebbe’s words on just one insignificant person, myself, after his death (although I know now that the Rebbe would say there is no such thing as an insignificant Jew). So imagine the impact he has had globally on observant, secular, and disaffected Jews and others throughout his lifetime and afterwards and be grateful, thankful, and honored to have been so influenced.
[1] I also spent a week at Chabad of Western Monmouth County in Manalapan Township, New Jersey.
[2] Rabbi Judah Mischel, “Marching Orders: Considering the Lubavitcher Rebbe’s Impact Twenty-Five Years Since His Passing,” Jewish Action, Fall 2019, https://jewishaction.com/jewish-world/people/marching-orders-considering-the-lubavitcher-rebbes-impact-twenty-five-years-since-his-passing/.
